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Sample Menu - Items and pricing subject to change with out notice Garden-Fresh Salads Served With Bakery-Fresh Bread Upon Request. Wraps (Id est: tasty stuffed tortilla treats, served with salad)
Chicken Caesar Wrap……………….......................................................…………….$9.99 Absolutely tasty. Like our Chicken Caesar Salad, but all snuggled up in a warm flour tortilla. Bacon Ranch Chicken Wrap…….......................................................………..…….$9.99 Absolutely tasty. Like our Bacon Ranch Chicken Salad (and the above sentence) and all snuggled up in a warm flour tortilla. Crispy Chicken Avocado Wrap….......................................................……….…….$9.99 Wanna see some exclamation point abuse? Crispy chicken! Avocado! Cheese! Warm flour tortilla! Okay, okay. Anyway: Add ranch or bleu (French for ‘mold’) cheese for zing. South of the Border Mini-Mex Appetizer Platter...............................................................$9.99 Sanwiches & Stuff All sandwiches are served with your choice of chips (translation: french fries), L.B.P.’s Famous Big Ben Burger...........................................................................$8.50
One-half £b cheese burger, cooked to order. Add bacon for 100 ¢.
UNSOLICITED TRIVIA MOMENT: Big Ben is the name of the bell, and not the clock. Like you care. Jason’s Jalapeño Cheddar Burger….....................................................................$9.50
A zippy burger named for Jason, a bartender here at the pub who talks funny because he’s
from Scotland. A NOTE TO THE CONSCIENTIOUS: We only use free-range jalapeño. Grilled Chicken Sandwich...................................................................................$8.99
Lite, tasty grilled breast of chicken. It’ll keep you “abreast” of things. Ha? Yeah, yeah, I know.
Didn’t do anything for me, either. Ham & Cheese.....................................................................................................$8.50
A good title for a community theater play, this inventive creation is ham, which is then
unusually combined with cheese and —get this— bread. Garlic Chicken Sandwhich...................................................................................$8.99
Oh yeah. Grilled & seasoned with garlic, this is one tasty little number. Don’t point out the
fact that ‘sandwich’ is misspelled. We know. Mama Cass Melt..................................................................................................$8.50
Yeah. Hot ham & cheese, all gooey and melty and stuff. It’ll give you good dreams tonight.
California dreams, without any, uh, consequences. Chickena Parmesana Sand-a-wicha......................................................................$9.99
Grilled a chicken, smothered in a marinara and a cheese a. And for a limited time, with your
order this little guy with an accordian’ll come to your table and play “That’s Amore.” Grilled Cheese Sandwich.....................................................................................$6.99
Does this really need to be explained? Hey, if you’re looking for a little whine with your
cheese, ask your waitress for separate checks. (A NOTE TO THE WISE: don’t.) Francis Bacon Ranch Chicken Sandwich............................................................. $9.99
This tasty, low-calorie pleaser is named for Sir Francis Bacon, some English guy who ran all
around Europe making these absurd claims, like he invented the question mark. The Club (SANDWICH).........................................................................................$8.99
You know: ham, turkey, bacon, cheese, lettuce, and, like, all that other stuff.
SO THE SAYING GOES: I wouldn’t want to belong to any club that would have me as a member. Except this one. Crispy Chicken Strip Sandwich............................................................................$9.99
Crispy, bearded breaded chicken strips and your choice of sauce. Carbs schmarbs.
Just enjoy yourself. (Hey you: add cheese for .50¢).
London Dip.........................................................................................................$9.99
Like a French Dip, see, only with our savory gravy instead of that au jous stuff. And served
by considerably nicer waiters. Well, most of the time. Jalapeño Cheddar Chicken Sandwich……............................................................$9.99
Hot & spicy & zesty jalapeños piled on to a cheesy chicken sandwich. Fear not: our fire
extinguishers are tested and serviced on a regular basis. Hot Roast Beef Sandwich....................................................................................$9.99
An open-faced, hearty delight served with mash. SOME HISTORY: We decided to serve this
hot after our “cold roast beef & icy gravy sandwich” idea fizzled. Go figure. Picadilly Cheese Steak.........................................................................................$9.99
Grilled beef, veggies, and cheese. Picadilly Circus is located in London. It’s got this big tent,
under which there’s all these clowns and animal acts and acrobats and they have— Chitty Chitty Bang Banger Sandwich...................................................................$9.99
Bangers are actually sausages. These little, stubby, kinda chubby, succulent English
sausages, now available between the buns. Bun. I mean bun. Grilled Cod Sandwich..........................................................................................$9.99
Our North Atlantic cod, seasoned and grilled to perfection. We were gonna call it
“Filet o’ Fish,” but we found out that the name was already taken. Veggie Burger......................................................................................................$8.50
A Garden Burger™ brand burger that’s not really possible to cook to order so usually we just
cook it. Add cheese for .50¢. If you want to make the cook giggle: add bacon for 100 ¢. It’s happened. Squidwich.........................................................................................................$10.50
Calamari strips either grilled or battered & fried. Some Background: We used to call it
“Freakish Tentacled Monster Sea Creature Sandwich.” Not many people ordered it, back then. Grilled Veggie Sandwich......................................................................................$8.99
A whole bunch of fresh, grilled veggies go into this healthy favorite. Add cheese for .50¢. Unlike
SOME places, all of our veggies are grown and harvested in fields by farmers, and not by extraterrestrial robot workers. Crab Cake Sandwich..........................................................................................$10.99
Two delicious crab cakes smothered in our seafood sauce and gingerly placed between a bun.
Note from Martha Stewart: It’s a good thing. Look up: an autographed picture of her is on the wall. Really. Barbecue Big Ben................................................................................................$9.50
Our one-half £b cheeseburger, all western style with barbecue sauce & bacon. Outstanding.
Wanna reek for a week? Pile on the onions, baby. Classic BLAT.....................................................................................$8.25
Bacon, Lettuce, and Tomato sandwich. In England, they say tomato. Those wacky Brits.
Here in America, tho, we say tomato. See the difference? Barbie Queue Chicken Sandwich.........................................................................$9.99
Chicken breast, grilled and covered with cheese & barbecue sauce. Add bacon for 100¢.
Add air conditioning for $8.99 Turkey Sandwich................................................................................................$8.50
Lite & tasty. Add bacon or cheese or avocado for 100¢. Yet another unsolicited trivia moment:
Ben Franklin wanted the turkey to be the National Bird. But, like we all now know, our Founding Fathers settled on the beagle. Barbecue Beef Sandwich......................................................................................$9.99
Shredded beef in tangy barbecue sauce. When you bite into one you’ll get the sensation you’re
on a hill overlooking El Paso, and you can see Rosa’s Cantina below. Entrees All entrees served with bakery-fresh bread on request London Bridge Pub’s Famous Fish & Chips
FULL ORDER: $10.99 / HALF ORDER: $8.99 Our famous fish & chips made with true cod in our beer batter. Comes with thick, Calamari & Chips
FULL ORDER: $11.99 / HALF ORDER: $9.99 Strips of our exclusive calamari (not the icky little chewy ones) in our famous beer batter,
served with thick, English-style chips, and peas. QUESTION: who was the first person to actually look at a squid and wonder what it must taste like? ANSWER: some guy. Combination Platter……..................................................................……….….…$10.99
If you’re one of the food-fickle, try the combo. It’s one part Fish & Chips, one part Calamari
& Chips. OUR SECRET BEER BATTER RECIPE REVEALED: yeah, right. You really think we’re going to just hand this to you? Now, stop trying to read this and order, for crying out loud. Irish Stew……….................................................................…………..……………….$8.99
Chunks of beef, carrots, potatoes, and onions in our savory gravy. Decisively more fulfilling than,
say, your typical fare at the McCourt house. The one on the lane. Especially at Christmastime. When Da’d be drinking in the pubs, singing the songs, telling people about how he’d done his bit. English Breakfast…………….…...................................................................………$8.50
Served ‘til 3:00pm. Two eggs cooked to order, bacon, grilled toast, a banger, and beans. The
British are just wild about beans. There’s even this little shop in London where you can actually get a bean smoothie. If I remember correctly, I believe the place is called “Tooters.” Smoked English Kipper………..................................................................……...$10.99
Smoked herring, served with your choice of mash or chips. DON’T WORRY ABOUT DEM
LITTLE BONES: You can eat them. Some places microwave their herring, others serve it ala mode. However, we prefer to smoke ours. FEAR NOT: it’s a nicotine-free process. Grilled Cod Dinner………...................................................................…….……...$13.99
Seasoned, flaky, grilled North Atlantic cod served with your choice of mash or chips, and either
a salad or a cup of soup. We usually buy our fish from a boat called the Andrea Gale. Haven’t heard from them in a while, tho. The Magna Carta…………...................................................................…….………$11.99
Grilled chicken breast served with your choice of mash or chips, and either a salad or a cup of
soup. MORE HISTORY: in Latin, Magna Carta means “big cart.” For some reason, this “big cart” is currently on display at the British National Museum. Crab Cake Dinner……...................................................................…………….…..$13.99
Two delicious crab cakes smothered in our special seafood sauce, served with your choice of
mash or chips, and either a salad or a cup of soup. BUT PLEASE: If you’re really feeling crabby, don’t take it out on us. Tiger Shrimp Dinner…....................................................................……….….….$13.99
Batter dipped shrimp, served with your choice of mash or chips, and either a salad or a cup of
soup. They’re grrrreat. A NOTE FROM OUR ATTORNEYS: Celebrity voice impersonated. This meal is in no way endorsed by Kellogg’s. So there. Bangers & Mash……….................................................................….………..………$9.99
A banger, you see, is a succulent, stubby English sausage named for the sound it makes
when improperly cooked. Mash is a funny ha-ha 12-year-long TV series about a not-so-funny boo-hoo 2-year-long war. OKAY, OKAY: If you’d like potatoes instead, we’ll do what we can to arrange it. Pastie & Mash……………………..................................................................………..$9.99
First of all, let’s get one thing straight: it’s pronounced “pah-stee.” Pay-stees are something
else altogether. Now, what a pastie is is it’s meat, potatoes, and veggies baked inside of a flaky pastry shell. Comes with mash & gravy.
Cottage Pie…………….……….……..................................................................…….$9.99
Hearty beef and veggies snuggled beneath a blanket of mash. If you’re not very hungry, you’d
be better off trying our “Studio Apartment Pie,” which is identical to the Cottage Pie in every way, minus the hearty beef, the veggies, and the potatoes. Poor Man’s Choice…………......................................................................….……..$5.50
Also known as the “Tech Stock Special,” this frugal dish is mashed potatoes, gravy, peas,
and onions, often ordered with a glass of water. HISTORY TIDBIT: once, this lady got mad and said we should change the name to “Economically Disadvantaged Person’s Option. ” A NOTE TO HER: sure thing, hon. Chicken Strips Platter……….....................................................................………..$9.99
Our breaded chicken strips, served with your choice of chips or mash, and either a side salad
or a cup of soup. Dip choices include ranch, honey mustard, and bleu cheese. We’ve discontinued the raw hamburger, broccoli & brussel sprout paste, and eucalyptus mayo dips. Sorry. Fredo’s Fettuccini Alfredo…..…....................................................................….$10.99
A heap of fettuccini smothered in our creamy Alfredo sauce. Perfect with our cheesy garlic
bread (add two & ½ bucks). A delicious dish devised by Fredo Corleone, who came up with it one day in Havana while he was out with Johnny Ola and Hymen Roth. Chicken Fettuccini Alfredo…….....................................................................….$13.99
Grilled chicken & pasta Alfredo. Absolutely out of this world. Net weight: 1.76 tons. An Italian
specialty served in a British pub located downstairs from a Japanese restaurant. Isn’t it ironic? Don’t ya think? It’s like rain on your wedding day. It’s the free ride--- Pasta Marinara………….……….…...................................................................…….$9.99
A hearty portion of pasta in marinara sauce. Add a side of our cheesy garlic bread, bangers, or
chicken for two & ½ bucks. ODD FACT: there really was a Chef Boy-ar-dee, whose name was in reality spelled Boiardi. And our point is….? Seafood Pasta Medley…………...................................................................……..$14.99
A tasty blend of pasta, crab, cod, and shrimp in our seafood sauce. And here, all this time you
were thinking that the only food you could get in a British pub were things like blood sausages and boiled meat. Chicken Pasta Carbonara………....................................................................…..$14.99
What we’re talking here is crispy chicken, creamy fettuccini alfredo, bacon
(couldn’t find a good adjective), and, uh, parmesanny parmesan cheese. A London Bridge favorite. Carb conscious? You’ll definitely be conscious of the carbs in this.
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